they say to smile with your eyes
but I did not know how
they say to laugh from the soul
but I did not know where it was
they say to be generous
but I had nothing to give
they say be kind
but I did not know what kindness was

so I only smiled with the sides of my lips
and laughed until my throat ached
gave away my heart and soul
and did my best to do no harm

until my heart bled
until my belly ached
until stone grew under foot
and no roots would grow

there was no where left to go
there was no one to run to
there was no where to turn
except to face the mirror

and watch my spirit burn

but it took a million deaths
to reach this point
it took some lucky generations to get here
it took a lot of false hope to come home
and the sad thing is…

how many more still have to smile with only their lips
until we can welcome each other home?

because at some point
food does not satisfy
people’s words become empty
songs become pointless sounds
and movies are just manufactured pictures

at this point some need time alone

to discover

there need be no reason

to smile